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Letting Go…Success! Part One

Miami and letting go.  I was so excited for my big weekend with my girlfriends!  I was well rested, had a few thoughts on what I wanted to do…but no expectations. I had let go of all I had told you in my earlier blog. “Letting Go.” http://bitchlifestyle.com/2009/11/letting-go/ The beauty junkie, the responsibility girl, the pressure of letting go on the ultimate of letting go trips:  the reunion in Miami. And the Love of My Life. Done with him.

I take my seat on the plane just as a new song starts. “Just Breathe,” by Faith Hill. “****!“ I say to myself. Because this is a song that reminds me of an intensely sensual experience with The Love of My Life. All my senses had been engaged, that song playing, him caressing my hand in a way that sent tingles up and down my body. Rain gently hitting the roof of the car, how good he smelled and tasted. I shake my head. Sitting next to me is a lovely couple on the way to their honeymoon. I then say to myself, “What the ****?”  LOL…it’s a good thing I have such a great sense of humor.  I enjoyed the irony very much.

I land in Miami and meet my friends at the airport.  We get to our rental apartment and go to our class. Absolute blast.  We each got a mantra written on a piece of paper as we left the class. Mine said: “My Pleasure is Contagious and Brings Everyone Around Me Higher.“ Then I went out to dinner with my beautiful best friend Mary Ann and a bunch of other girls.  Right across the street is a sex shop. Not a sleazy looking one, an inviting one.  After dinner we explore the shop.  We have so much fun in there that a man shells out his last $20.00 to give us a gift! It was a lube that also stimulates a woman. He apologized for not having enough money to get us all one. So sweet. We thanked him and invited him to our party the next night.   An adorable light pink whip was on the wall and for some reason I just had to have it. So I bought it and we went back to our apartment.  Thanks so much  for the perfect travel experience, my lovely roommates, yummy food and the free lube!  More please!

The next day was Saturday.  I have a huge girl crush on Debbie Rosas, the founder of Nia and she was leading a special 8 am Nia class for us! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zbIUuD_4uM  Debbie had the lights turned down and we moved to sensual and playful music.  Her voice is beautiful, soothing and I love it.  I gave Debbie a big hug and thank you later that day.

After Nia, I wrote my desires for the weekend in my notebook.  The first was “Letting Go” and I drew a heart around it. The second was “Soft sensual touch and kisses,” and drew a heart around it as well. Then we went to lunch and then the beach. It was way too rough to skinny dip.   Then on to dinner and getting ready for our big party.

As we were getting ready for dinner the song “Head Over Heels” by Tears for Fears started playing. Again with the Love of My Life reminder. We had been flirting in the library and he joked that he felt like he was in a Tears for Fears video. The next time we got together, this song was playing. And we laughed about it. And there have been other key times this song has popped up between us. Yeah…and they are married at the end of the video.  More irony…very funny!

Mary Ann wanted to go to her favorite beans and rice place. The only thing next to it was a taco place. I did not want tacos! But my feminine intuition screamed to listen to her. So I did. Off we went to go get tacos and tequila. Mary Ann, Lauren, Ellen and I are sitting down to our tacos and tequila, and out of nowhere he came. An adorable 26 year old man. He called each woman at our table “beautiful.” When he got to me he said “Marry Me.”  Whoa, right? You’re not going to believe what came flying out of my mouth when he asked me to marry him. I said point blank:

“Can I spank you?”

What? I guess I was just dying to try out that whip.

Coming up…the gift of fun and play beyond my wildest dreams!  Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies

Letting Go




Letting go. Whether it’s using up the last bit of your favorite beauty product, friends you’ve lost touch with, doubt, or the love of your life. It’s difficult to let go of things that once made us feel so good, but don’t anymore. I’m letting go of some huge things in my life. By letting go I’m moving forward.

Letting Go Number One: My need to be a beauty product junkie. My need began when I was an actress in Los Angeles years ago. I was broke. Whenever I had an important social event I couldn’t afford a new outfit. I could afford a new 99 cent eye liner or nail polish. Those were my treats. So when I started making more money, I would go nuts buying whatever beauty product my heart desired. The pay off is amazing skin. But I had a closet full of beauty products that kept growing! I was buying more beauty products than I could use, and holding on to them for dear life. It symbolized something I’d attained: the ability to obtain fun, expensive beauty products. But I’m not a broke actress anymore. Over the last couple weeks I’ve slowly been going through them. Savoring them and appreciating that I could now afford to replace them.

Letting Go Number Two: Letting go of The Love of My Life. Years ago I was at the premiere of a play called “Just Say Love.” When I saw it, it touched me deeply. I so desired for the Love of My Life to tell me he loved me. I thought that was the lesson of the play entering my life. It wasn’t. The lesson was for me to “Just Say Love” to me. This play’s premiere was a metaphor for the start of my personal love affair with me. And it grew into this web site! I had to start choosing myself over the Love of My Life. I was working way too hard for the love of my life and getting hurt and not appreciated in return. No more. I now choose myself. “Just Say Love” has been all over me this week, and whenever I need to choose loving myself first and foremost. Amazing, huh?

Letting Go Number Three: Letting go of my leadership responsibilities. For the first time in 6 years I will not be present at a show for the improvisational comedy group I created. This very important show is this weekend. I had practice the last couple months. I was present in shows, but did not take the leadership role. All I had to do was play. That was hard for me to do at first but felt wonderful. Last night I was uptight before rehearsal. Jason, one of the actors in the troupe knew that something was up for me. He asked what it was and I told him that this week was all about “letting go,” and gave him details. He listened beautifully and kept reassuring me everything was going to run perfectly. Thank you Jason!  Which leads me to the reason why I won’t be at the show this weekend:

Letting Go Number Four: My semi-annual trek to Miami with my 300 girlfriends is this weekend. It’s all about researching our pleasures and wants. LETTING GO. Surrendering to the “slightly wicked” in us…or the “deeply wicked.” It depends on how far we want to go. It’s all up to each of us. It’s safe. These wonderful 300 women will not judge. You’re a trapeze artist on the edge of a precipice…on the verge of flying. Your safety net is 300 gorgeous smiling women. And there is so much pressure! Even with all the permission in the world in a safe setting it’s hard to fully let go! But that, ladies, is not what I will focus on. I will focus on being in the moment and not worrying. And I’ve begun by starting before I go this weekend. I’m doing this by taking the best care of myself. Taking more time to pamper myself, rest, and communicating my unease at “letting go.” Reveling in all the vulnerability this entails.

This is a lot in one week, huh? If I can do it…so can you. So take a little bite at letting something go today. Just a little one. A taste. A sample. Maybe tomorrow you take a little rest…or do a bit more. It’s your love affair. You’re the boss. (Sly wink) Love, Goddess



© S Stevens Life Strategies


“I Love it When People Doubt Me.” Rodney Harrison

Rodney Harrison.  Photo courtesy of Fox Sports.


“I love it when people doubt me.”  Rodney Harrison.   I absolutely love this quote.  It’s inspiring and blunt.  When I get a smidgen of doubt, I glance at this quote in my office.  I remember when I first heard the quote.  Rodney Harrison was a football player on  The New England Patriots and had sustained a “career ending injury.”  Doctors, friends, family and the press were all telling him it was over.  But he still wanted to play.  He wasn’t ready to retire.  His passion for playing football was full throttle.  So he worked his (might I say very cute) butt off to get back on the football field. 

And Mr. Harrison did.  He got back on the football field and played two more seasons.  He recently retired and is a commentator on NBCs Sunday Night Football.  While at New England, he was a fiery, passionate and motivating leader on the team.  And I learned a lot from listening and watching him during his years as a New England Patriot.   Thank you Mr. Harrison for your inspiring strength and leadership.  For teaching me to look fear and doubt in the face and go for my passions.  For teaching me how to inspire those I’m leading.  You taught me that whatever wall is thrown up before me I must break through it to learn, grow and get to the next level of success. 

So who inspires you?  Is there a quote that makes you sit up straighter and continue?  A picture?  An inspiring story from your own life or a book/movie?  Let’s all take a moment and bask in that inspiration.  Thank you thank you!  Then look fear and doubt in the face, smile at it and blow it a sassy good-bye kiss!

Love, Goddess


© S Stevens Life Strategies