Fabulous! I want your absolute favorite person to be with is you. When you have that kind of love for yourself and your life, can you imagine the magnet for fun you will be? You will need the time alone to nap and restore your energy! To nap so you can receive all the pleasure coming toward you. To calmly handle all the drama that others cannot handle that you will. With flying colors.
I’m giving you a fun little assignment today. I want you to find the nearest mirror and gaze at your gorgeous reflection. Admire how beautiful you are and say:
“It’s exhausting being fabulous.”
Because truly falling in love with yourself is an exhausting journey. To confront and conquer your negative emotions and move into sassy confidence is not fulfilling unless you do the work and enjoy the process. The process of loving passionate, fiery, loving and so much fun it hurts YOU! This “It’s exhausting being fabulous” exercise is now at your fingertips for you to use every single day. One day it may make you giggle a little bit. Another day it is the last thing you will want to do and you’ll have attitude about it. Example from a client:
Client: (looking over her assignments from me) Okay. She wants me to look in the mirror and say “It’s exhausting being fabulous.” Pfft. Seriously. I don’t want to. (long dramatic pause) Okay, fine. “I’m fabulous.” (rolls eyes at herself)
Then when we do the assignment together, something strange happens. For some reason she has a lot more fun doing it. She initially says “no way!” to me, but then I make her do it like she means it. It takes like, 20 times of saying it, but by the 19th, my client starts feeling it. Despite all her protests, she starts feeling good. Happy, sexy. Why? Because initial she is focused on not wanting to do it. Which is what the Drama Queen Brat would do. Because I am giving her attention, the Drama Queen starts feeling satisfied. Because it feels better to feel fabulous my client starts believing it! The attention and fun we are having with her Brat makes her turn into Sassy Bitch.
See what this one little exercise can do for you? Good. Now go do it! Love, Goddess
My favorite movie of all time is It’s a Wonderful Life. If you don’t know the story and you haven’t watched it. WATCH IT! The hero in the movie, George Bailey, makes sacrifice after sacrifice for his family. Near the end of the movie, a mistake by a family member threatens to ruin George. (Uncle Billy loses $8000.00 which is owed to Mr. Potter. Uncle Billy thinks he’s lost it, but it is actually stolen by Mr. Potter) Mr. Potter has been trying to get the upper hand over George and now has it. George tries to fix the problem caused by his uncle by offering Mr. Potter his insurance policy as collateral. Mr. Potter has no interest. He wants to own George and the town. Mr. Potter, enjoying his triumph says to George: “You’re worth more dead than alive.” Which, because it is the truth, rocks George to the core. Because of this truth and because he loves his family so much, he actually contemplates suicide. What he sees at this horrible moment in his life are all of his failures. How at this moment all the hard work and sacrifice has only brought him here…failure. And being a wonderful man, can only think of how to save his family from suffering.
He doesn’t understand all the people he helped and has touched along the way. Clarence, his guardian angel shows him how his sacrifices made everyone elses’ life better:
George is deaf in one ear because he saved his brother when he fell through some ice on a pond. If he hadn’t been there to help his brother, he would have died. When George’s brother enlisted in the army, George stayed behind to take care of the family business and loan office. If he hadn’t done this, his brother Harry wouldn’t have been there to save all the men on his sea transport.
George was working for the local pharmacist. The pharmacist was completely distraught over the death of his wife. George saves him from making a terrible mistake regarding someones’ medication.
Georges’ one wish was to travel the world. He planned to do this on his honeymoon with his new wife, Mary. He didn’t go at the last-minute because Mr. Potter was planning a financial coupe that would affect everyone in town. He forgoes his honeymoon and saves the day.
Because George kept his savings and loan office open, the families in town didn’t have to go to Mr. Potter for loans. Mr. Potter was all about owning, not the people. George knew this and worked with all the families so they could have their homes and freedom from Mr. Potter. His family had less, but the whole town was free of the tyranny of Mr. Potter.
When George thought he was ruined from the $8000.00 loss, those who loved him took action and raised the money.
A Wonderful Life reminds me of two important things:
What you give you get. Mr. Potter took and took and took. He had no one. He was bitter and consumed with a need to best George. Talk about a Drama Queen, eh?
What you do affects everyone around you.
A lot of people today seem to be unaware of how their actions affect others! My improv group has regular performances on Saturday nights. I am surprised about how many people are late to the shows. Not just 5 minutes, but up to 20 minutes late. I really appreciate them coming and I regularly thank them. But they walk in late and distract from the show, so that affects everyone else. Then you go to the market, store or whatever and people stop to look at their receipt or something and they stand in the door. They just stop. Or people have a lot of drama in their lives and walk around like Debbie Downer all the time. Everyone has a bad day, but these people have a bad week, month, etc!
I think a lot of this has to do with being distracted with the important things in life-like giving to those you love and respecting others.
We are distracted by so many things! And so much of it is fluff! I was talking to a bunch of women in their early twenties recently. Just for fun, I asked them about things that would benefit them over time, current events and things that could inspire them in their career paths. (For instance if they wanted to start a business I would ask them what business people they were inspired by) Not one knew who the Vice President of the United States was. Not one had someone they considered a mentor. But they all knew Beyoncé was pregnant. I asked them how knowing Beyoncé was pregnant would help them with their career paths. (With a wink and a smile) They got it. I sent them on their way with a fun list of things to do to help them focus on their passions.
Now I’m all for a little smut now and then. But keep up, people…with what is important. I wish Beyoncé all the best but she doesn’t care one whit about my problems and I don’t expect her to. So ask yourself this, hotties. How focused are you on whats’ important? Notice how everyone else is distracted from what is important. I was at dinner the other night and saw a family out together. The two adults were talking and the four kids were on their phones texting. The whole time. Even when their food came. These kids don’t know how to enjoy their parents, their parents don’t seem to be enjoying them and no one enjoyed the food. I found it sad.
So when is the perfect time to “un – distract” yourself? Right now is the perfect weekend! It’s Memorial Day weekend and I, Bitch Guardian Angel, am giving you one little task. Unplug. Keep your computer off. Turn your phone off and put it away. Especially when you are at that barbecue or with the ones you love. What you give is what you get: Do something nice for someone just because you can! What you do affects everyone around you: Notice what your family does that you absolutely adore. For instance, my Mom is so darned cute when she gets a new appliance. She walks around with her directions and shares how to use it. It’s cute because it is so her! It always makes me smile. When someone around you makes you smile give them a hug and say thank you. See how infectious that is? Do the same just for fun.
Memorial Day is about something much deeper than a couple extra days off. Memorial Day is about sacrifice. George gladly sacrificed for those he loved in It’s a Wonderful Life. Memorial Day is about the sacrifice of men and women who fought and died for our country. Triumph. Their triumph is our triumph. Their triumph allows us to enjoy our new appliances, texting, shopping, barbeques and wonderful families. Know anyone who was or is in our Armed Forces? Thank them. Bonus points for huge, warm hugs.
You have three days…unplug and immerse yourself in what is truly wonderful…moments in life. Love, Goddess
Anne Taintor image from Shop at Art Works http://www.shopatartworks.com/image/cache/data/products/5398_OpinionBeverageNapkin-500×500.jpg
Self esteem and keeping it high! Today at Bitch University we discuss serious Sass Zappers. Sass Zappers 101 features my top five worst. (With a fun bonus from Mr. Einstein above) I used to do these and now? No freakin’ way. I will not be sucked into the Sass Zapper muck. I vow to keep my self esteem hight! The muck threatens and test us almost daily. Oh yes it does. When we are tired, cranky or just haven’t gotten the attention we must have the muck can have its way with us. I can’t help it…the muck stops here! 😉 Let’s go over my top 5 Sass Zappers and the action a Sassy Bitch can take to stay out of the dirty, low self esteem slimy muck.
1. Putting your own needs on the back burner. And with each new task you take on without taking care of yourself, you push your needs further and further away. And you wonder why you get so pissy sometimes? Take care of you and things you want will be produced quicker and easier. You will have the energy, drive and restored passion to do so! Action: Long bath, early to bed with a pile of magazines, a weekend away, a massage, an afternoon with your favorite movie and lots of buttery popcorn.
2. Holding grudges. Oh … here we go. How much time have we wasted being pissed about something or someone we have absolutely no control over? It hurt so much that we just can’t let it go. So what do we do? We hold on to it so we can be hurt more, complain about it more and sniff…suffer more. Drama Queen loves to suffer. Action: Have a little “letting go” ritual. Take a whole day if you have to. Take a piece of paper and write down the grudge you are holding on to. Go for a long walk. Work out the edginess, anger and hurt. Then rip up the piece of paper and burn it up in an ash tray or flush it down the toilet. Take a deep breath and then do something that makes you feel really good. Then hold on to that feeling instead of the hurt and pain.
3. Buying happiness. We live in I want it and need it now world. Instant gratification. Instant debt. Action: Taking care of your future. Appreciating what you have! I can’t tell you how much crap I have gotten over the years because I haven’t bought the newest gadget, phone, car, outfit etc. I am much more grateful for time with my family, unexpected pleasures and spending time playing with my amazing friends. Action: The next time you must have something ask yourself if you really need it. I know shiny iPhones and new cars are fab, but will you go into debt to get them? Debt is no fun and limits what you can do. Focus on all you have and enjoy THAT. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted something and I’ve gotten it for free instead of buying it. Food, Kindles and even cars. Yeah. I want this for you too.
4. Being jealous. Being jealous is simply wanting what someone else has. Action: Stop being jealous and take action on achieving your goals for life, love and career. Say to yourself…wow. I love how my friend Shelly is always doing something fun! I’m going to ask her if I can come on her outings and also start looking for my own fun adventures to try.
5. Blaming everyone for your troubles. This is so annoying. It is rare to see someone take responsibility today. They make the decision, something goes wrong and then they blame someone else for the error. This is being a coward. A child. Adults learn how to take the heat and learn from their mistakes. Shit happens and adults understand that things so wrong. By taking responsibility you empower yourself and those who depend on you. Action: Take responsibility for your own life. If you make a mistake, acknowledge it and then fix it. It will do so much for others’ respect for you and your ability to cope with issues! It will put their trust in you and your word. Trust is everything.
All these Sass Zappers keep you from the fun. The possibilities that every day holds. What sounds more fun, planning your next adventure or holding a grudge? 😉 Love, Goddess
Negative emotions…have you ever found yourself in these sorts of downward spirals?
You are absolutely relishing the thought of an opportunity…then you start to stew and over think it.
You want more than anything for x, y or z to happen at work. Then you start thinking of all the things that can keep you from accomplishing it.
You have a family or social affair and THEY will be there. That person who knows exactly how to push your buttons. How do you deal? How do you find the patience?
You have found an amazing man. Your last couple dates beyond amazing. And he smells so good. But he hasn’t asked you to be his girlfriend yet. So you start to worry. Does he like me? What did I do wrong? Then you start saying this to yourself…the oh so dramatic relationship killer: “If I do this…then he will love me.”
You must stop this so you can get to the action needed to help you on your way to career and love heights!
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