Worst Way to Break up with Someone?




worst way to break off with someone
Image from the healthy website Sound Fit

Worst way to break up with someone?

I was watching TV this morning when something stopped my restless remote surfing.  An interview on Fox News about how not to screw up Valentines Day.  It was with relationship expert Siggy Flicker of Marie Claire magazine.  I thought most of her advice was good. One was horrible. Colorful language awful.  It’s a big reason why relationships are so hard today and why it’s so hard to trust someone!  A question was asked to Ms. Flicker:  I want to break off with my boyfriend. Should I wait until after Valentines Day?

Difficult situation?  Absolutely.  Which one would you choose for your boyfriend?

  1. Yes.  Spare his feelings and let him take you out.  Break off with him the next day.  You don’t want to make Valentines Day a tragedy for him for the rest of his life.
  2. No.  Be honest and tell him that it’s not going to work.  Wish him well.

The bottom line is you want to break up.  Deal with that and don’t create more drama and hurt by lying and putting off the truth.  What do you think, Sassy Ones? Ms. Flicker advice was option #1 from above.  My blood boiled over that advice. How would you like to be taken on a wonderfully romantic date and then dumped the next day?  To spare your feelings?  Are you kidding me?  If a man made love to me and then broke up with me the next day?  I would realize it was just sex for him.  So I would feel heartbroken and used! Regarding a difficult choice always go with the more honest option.  At the very least you’re being honest.

You can’t love and trust without honesty.

I interviewed lots of men regarding this matter.  Here are the most popular answers:

“The sooner the better.”  Gary

“She’s giving him false hope.”  Giovanni

“Before Valentine’s Day.  My girlfriend dumped me on Valentine’s day.  I spent my lunch money on chocolates and flowers and she dumped me.”   Jon

“She isn’t dealing with the problem.  She’s just putting things off.”  Gary…again…great advice.

“By being afraid of hurting him she’s hurting him more.”  Ben

“Wow.  What a crappy way to break off with someone.”  Paul

“She’s avoiding the problem.”  Barry

“Both are bad. Personally if I were to end things I would wait ’til at least a week after Valentine’s Day. But if I have to choose between them, it depends how things are going. If things are clearly bad and we’d just be going through the motions on Valentine’s Day, I’d appreciate her dumping me before so I don’t have to spend a bunch of money creating a romantic night for us. If things are mostly ok but she wants to break up because it’s “just not quite right,” then I think we should have one last Valentine’s Day fun night together and then end it.”  Howie  Notice how this answer involves communication between the couple?  Howie would communicate openly about the issue.

“I think, as a man, I would prefer the break up to happen before Valentine’s Day.  Conversely, I think women would prefer the opposite.”  Steven

“I guess, I would prefer before, to avoid that day and spending money on the young lady, because you would feel used.”  Ezra

And input from my very wise and strong best friend Mary Ann:

“It’s the difference between the weak person and the strong person.  The weak person avoids the problem, the strong one deals with it.”  Mary Ann

So there you have it.  The worst way to break up with someone.  Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies

Suggested Reading:

  1. Best Dating Advice: Are You Easy to Date?
  2. Healthy Eating for Pleasure! 
  3. Bitch Lifestyle Home


Ice Dancing Perfection

Video from  cangp08 on YouTube

Ice Dancing Perfection. Last week I was blown away by the grace, beauty and strength of this ice dancing team from the United States:  Meryl Davis and Charlie White.  Their fluidity and execution is the result of natural talent and working hard together for 17 years.  17 years.  Success doesn’t happen over night, beauties!  Perfection has hard work behind it. Last night they skated for the gold medal.  I resisted the urge to peak at the spoilers.  I wanted to watch them skate without knowing the outcome.  It makes the watching that much more powerful…the not knowing how it turns out.

As I watched them perform, this Sassy Bitch started to cry.  Cry because the beauty of their skating moved me to it.  The way they move together and the way her body moves!  The body of woman is such a pleasure to watch.  Meryl has trained her body to make the movements look effortless.  And we all know the truth.  We cannot duplicate that artistry without breaking something!  So I wanted to share with you.  Share the inspiration of hard, yet passionate work.  The beauty of it all coming together.   I wanted you to have this to help you take the next action on the path to your dreams.  To make you want to relish more.  Strive more and celebrate all your victories on the path to sweet perfection and success! To you reaching and attaining whatever aspiration that is going to give you your gold medal in life!

This video shows their recent performance in Boston Mass.  It’s the same performance they used in the Sochi Olympics.  Enjoy.  Want more?  Here is their website for more!  Meryl-Charlie  

Love, Goddess

Suggested Reading:

  1. Fight for Yourself!
  2. Cleopatra
  3. Competitiveness:  Where Has it Gone?

© S Stevens Life Strategies

Hedy Lamarr

hedy lamarr,famous inventors,women inventors,
Gorgeous image of Hedy Lamarr from Classic Cinema Images

Hedy Lamarr…one of the most gorgeous movie stars to ever grace the big screen.  But we aren’t going to talk about that today.  Sure, I’m going to share some beautiful pictures of her for your viewing pleasure.  What we are going to discuss is something you may not know about her.  Have not one clue about.  The fact that this beautiful and talented actress had another passion.  She was also  a brilliant inventor.  That’s right.  She and her partner in invention crime, George Anthiel, discovered something so ahead of their time it took the world YEARS to catch up.  The year they patented their product was 1941.  It was a  “Secret Communication System” that rocked the world.  What they discovered did the following:

  1. Helped defeat the Nazi’s in World War 2
  2. Helped the United States military in numerous applications.  It helped us survive the Cuban Military Crisis.
  3. Completely changed the way the world communicates today.
  4. Enables us numerous forms of communication making work and life tasks run quickly and effectively.
  5. You now use the technology she developed every single day.

WAY ahead of her time.  So what did she and George Anthiel invent?

Spread Spectrum technology.


Spread Spectum technology manipulates radio frequencies at irregular intervals between transmission and reception.


Spread Spectrum technology forms the backbone of our modern day digital technology.  It allows us the pleasure of using fax machines, cell phones and all wireless communication.

Ahhhh…got it!

Another gorgeous image of Hedy Lamarr from Classic Cinema Images

Pretty cool, huh?  So there you have it.  Beauty and brains.  Talent and sexiness.  All rolled into one hot Austrian tamale.  The next time you use one of your wireless communication forms just remember who was the brilliant brain behind it.  The gorgeous and oh so talented Ms. Hedy Lamarr.  Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies

My book on Amazon: Bitch Lifestyle the Manual

Competitiveness Where Has it Gone?

Gorgeous image from Barb’s Centre for Dance

Competitiveness. The good kind. The kind that fuels your fire for success! How do you react when you hear these?

  1. You can’t do that.
  2. Why would you want to do that?
  3. Impossible.
  4. You don’t have it.
  5. Why don’t you try something easier?
  6. You’re not being fair.  That can KILL the good kind of competitiveness.  Watch being fair to the point of destroying what you are creating.
  7. To the blank stare you get when you share your idea or passion with someone.

If you aren’t rolling your eyes?  Renew your passionate competitiveness!  Competition is not a bad word. You want a gold medal?  You have to train. You want to be an actor or singer?  You have to train.  You want to be a lawyer?  Train.   Then apply the training.  The athlete has the sporting event.  The actor the audition. The lawyer the courtroom. Athlete, actor, lawyer…not one will succeed without the training and applying.  There will always be people competing for one opportunity. So relish the opportunity. Relish relish relish! Know when to fight.  Make giving up not an option. My regular readers know I run an improv group.  Our goal is to perform in Boston and beyond. A little over a year ago we lost a major opportunity. Performing at a well-known comedy theatre in Boston. My intuition was telling me we would be better on our own.  I had to convince the group of that. How? By getting another performing opportunity.  ASAP.  I knew that would motivate people.  A year later and we have 3 shows a month, a Director and groups coming to us because of our hard work. YES!

Want an example of something that kills “good competitiveness” today?  Twitter.  Twitter has nice people (check out my Twitter Twitterati list on @Goddesspower) It’s also has nasty people.  They take to Twitter and complain about everything.  They mock people and ideas.  You, me, how pathetic their lives are and exactly how they would do things and make things better.  ‘Cept they never do.  It’s passive action.  They are mean to millions but they can’t see their own fear and lack of courage.  Worse?  They lie to give their ideas truth.  Or don’t check their facts.  Because they read it somewhere.  Lies hurt people.  So is being uninformed.  Being uninformed hurts yourself.  This is a fun example from Jimmy Kimmel Live YouTube:


Watch out!  Lying and being uninformed may get you national exposure.  LOL.  So how do we stay OUT of the negative side of competitiveness?  It’s not easy…but here are some practical and fun ways!

  1. Avoid becoming close with people who compete with you in an unhealthy way.
  2. After a day surrounded with competitive, bad energy people?  Wash them off…literally.  Surround yourself in beauty to counteract the ugly.
  3. Instead of spending the day on social media, turn it off and call someone you’re close to and make a live date!
  4. Tell a fun male friend that you want them to tickle you until you beg for mercy.
  5. Wine, pomegranate margarita, scorpion bowl.  Depends on the day.  😉
  6. Find positive people.  Watch and learn. Soak in their energy!
  7. Keep encounters with people who work competitiveness in a negative way brief.  Prepare:  Have polite responses ready.
  8. Do something nice anonymously. It’s fun!
  9. Treat yourself to a blow out, pedicure or massage.
  10. Meditate.  I had to do that yesterday.  A LOT (lol)
  11. Create your “competitive dance.”  A dance to celebrate, encourage and wallow in when things go awry.
  12. Relish your passions!

Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies