By   April 25, 2011

confidence

Anne Tainter picture from the Exofugal 

Where does it come from?  Today at Bitch University we discuss.  Confidence as defined by Merriam-Webster

Confidence: con·fi·dence  noun \ˈkän-fə-dən(t)s, -ˌden(t)s\ a : a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances <had perfect confidence in her ability to succeed> <met the risk with brash confidence> b : faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way <have confidence in a leader> 2a: the quality or state of being certain : certitude <they had every confidence of success 3a : a relation of trust or intimacy <took his friend into his confidence> b :reliance on another’s discretion <their story was told in strictest confidence>

People have to earn your confidence through trust.  Before you can earn theirs, you must earn YOURS.  You can’t give love unless you love and trust yourself first, right?  Loving yourself is confidence.  You trust yourself above all.  So you make the right decisions for you.  Confident Love!  Since there are a million ways to gain confidence, I’m going to highlight a few, and you can take your pick where you want to start.

1.  Knowing what you want. This is key because every day you’ll take steps to make this happen.  Every step gives you confidence.  If you make a mistake, you learn.  If you succeed-you just took another step on the confidence stairway.   What if you don’t know what you want?  Does this make you blue?  It makes The Brat blue. Who Controls You Your Bitch or Brat?   The Bitch sees it as a world of exploration.  She tries different things and stays grounded in what she loves.  This keeps her happy, creative, playful and opens her eyes to see how she can get more of what she loves.  Suddenly goals, steps, organization becomes a little more appealing.  Setbacks are a challenge to win, not the end of the world.  Inspiration:  The fabulous Michelle Yeoh 

2.  Communication: Once you find out what you want, you have to learn how to communicate effectively.  It smooths over fights, gets things done, encourages love and keeps you from taking crap.  Practice everyday.  Write down everything you want and communicate to people.  See what works, what doesn’t.  Think to yourself, is a text really going to help me reach this goal, or a face to face encounter.  Take the Communication Bull by the horns, Bitches!

3.  Organization: Organization, not just for said want but everything in your life keeps things moving forward.  If your day to day life isn’t organized, it’s going to be tough to realize goals/wants in a timely fashion.  What do you need to get everything done?  Make practical choices.  Don’t be impatient (like me!) and go over board.  Work on one thing at a time on your list.  Like everything, this is something that I’ve learned over time.  Just take the first step and all you have to do is keep going.

4.  Playtime: Playtime is key to keeping you looking forward to the joys in life.  A tickle from your lover, a spring time stroll, trying a new activity, a tough work out.  They offer delicious distractions that will help you regain and keep focus.  It also spurs your creativity, like Sheila Kelley’s S Factor.  

5.  Glamour: Taking care of you.  You know what you look like if you don’t get enough sleep.  The quickest road to glamour for me is enough sleep!  And glitter or lip gloss 😉 .  Take care of yourself on your journey here, too.  This is wonderful self love.  Know what you need to feel your best.  And do it.  You never know when some unexpected opportunity will arise.  And you want to be 100% ready!  Elle Woods will show you how it’s done HERE 

That’s a lot.  Remember…don’t go overboard and do all at once!  Slow and steady like the hare wins the race. Start anywhere on this list.  Expand from there.  Every day is a new day to take a step higher on the confidence ladder.   Love, Goddess
© S Stevens Life Strategies

One Comment on “Confidence

  1. Spell Vixen

    This was great because it made me feel more confident! Thanks SO much for these ideas and suggestions!

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