By   February 7, 2012

Focus Image from the web site Life Hack:  http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/how-to-practise-the-art-of-detached-focus-to-achieve-your-goals.html

Focus Bitch.

This is for the beauties who read this web site and are worried about a guy they like or are dating.  It’s for the beauties that are rockin’ their guys and need a gentle reminder.  We all do sometimes.  We’re emotional creatures and sometimes our emotions, our Drama Queens crave attention.  Sometimes we misplace that attention.  We put pressure on our guys to give us that attention when we could just as easily put it on ourselves and allow him to give freely.  The key is the word “pressure.”  Maybe it’s the oxytocin:  http://bitchlifestyle.com/2011/04/the-cuddle-hormone-2/ maybe we haven’t quite grown into our Sassy Bitch and our confidence isn’t there.  Maybe we don’t get the fact that we are truly beautiful.  Then our Drama Queens take over and “attach” ourselves to a guy because we want attention from him.  HIM.  We like him so much!!!!  We must have him!!!!  When you find yourself saying, writing, worrying about how to get him to chase you, love you, want you, it’s time to make a choice.  Worry?  Or…

FOCUS.

Focus on what you can control.  Cuz’ it’s not him.  What you can focus on is YOU and your choices.

You can choose to worry about why he hasn’t answered a text and send another one.  Then you can worry about why he hasn’t answered the original text and the 2nd text.  Then you can get a bit pissed off and send a 3rd text.  Now you can worry and fret about why he hasn’t answered 3 texts you’ve sent him.  And send another…and another.

Or.

You can focus on what truly matters to your growth as a person, those you care about and your career and life goals.  Or you can whine about the fact that the choice I just gave you doesn’t “get him to chase you.”  That is so very cute of your Drama Queen, isn’t it?  That’s not why your reading this.  You’re reading this so you can claim your Sassy Bitch.  So give your Drama Queen the attention she wants by focusing attention on you:

  1. Make a list of everything you want to accomplish in life.  The fun, the crazy the ones that will fulfill you.
  2. Volunteer.  If your Drama Queen really needs a kick in the butt?  Volunteer at a hospital.  A hospital is full of sick and dying people.  That should put worrying about a text in perspective.
  3. For Valentines Day-what I like to call the “Day of Love” make a list of those that truly love you.  Your Dad, Brother, Mom, Sister, Nieces, Nephews, your BFF.  Make heart felt Valentines for them.
  4. Keep your calendar full. Your goal being a calendar full of things that light you up and make you feel good.
  5. Appreciating your beauty every day.  Be grateful for your gorgeous skin, curvy thighs, beaming smile, sparkling eyes.  Blow yourself a kiss when you walk by a mirror.
  6. Get spiritual.  Meditate, relax, go for a long walk, kick-box.
  7. Eat yummy healthy foods.
  8. Giving out love sends it back to you.  Greet those you love with a warm hug always.  When you depart, give them a warm hug again.
  9. When you start worrying, start listing all the things you’re grateful for.  Use this as a tool when you start worrying again.

Oh…and one more thing.  You know those guys you don’t like that constantly text you, ask you out and are chasing you that you don’t want to date ?  Don’t be “that guy” to your guy.  Here’s an article just for you:  Why Men You Don’t Like Chase You:  http://bitchlifestyle.com/2011/04/why-men-you-dont-like-chase-you/

Another thing to be aware of:  How to Get a Girl to Chase You  http://bitchlifestyle.com/2011/10/how-to-get-a-girl-to-chase-you/

Here is one last tid bit to get you re-focused on YOU and not worried about a guy who is not chasing you.  If he isn’t asking you out, calling you and trying to make hot little you smile?  I’m a little worried about his taste.  (Sassy smile)  Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies

10 Comments on “Focus

  1. Jacklyn

    It can be frustrating to want the attention and desire from the guy and knowing that the guy knows you desire him (or not) and does nothing about it. It can also be frustrating to know that WE put up with this. There are certain times where I just want to have affection. Physical affection. To be held, kissed, made love to is something I desire. I am not going to just go out with any guy just to have that though. Like you said, I can only control myself and my actions. I choose to control myself even if I get sad or upset. Because it boils down to having respect for myself and working on my self esteem which requires me to focus.

  2. Goddesspower

    Jacklyn…every time you comment you do it so beautifully. Thank you for taking the time to share your beautiful and oh so feminine thoughts! Love, Goddess

  3. Necarrus

    I have that problem, where I tend to focus on the man (or men) in my life that I forget about me! I always do that…become so codependent on a man and if he likes me, want me, etc…and I hate it!

  4. Goddesspower

    Hi Necarrus, do you see how cool your comment is? You see what you are doing. That’s half the battle. Your “Drama Queen” hates it and refuses to let go of the pattern. Your “Sassy Bitch” brought you to Bitch Lifestyle for actions to move you forward. So now you can start choosing your Bitch by taking one of the actions in the post. Does that make sense? Love, Goddess

  5. Necarrus

    Yes, that makes sense to me! I especially like #6…definitely going to start doing that

  6. Jai

    Thanks Goddess! This rescued me big time today. I was able to get my focus back on my own life and kept myself busy until he finally texted me. 🙂 Strange how the drama queen loves to stare at the phone or email account for hours, instead of working out, doing laundry or whatever. LOL. Thanks for this article which woke my sassy bitch up again. 🙂

  7. Goddesspower

    Jai…this is so brilliant. I love how in tune you are with your “Drama Queen” and how she loves to waste time! You’re welcome and GO YOU! Love, Goddess

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