Inappropriate Things to Say on a First Date

dating, inappropriate things to say on a date, dating advice, relationship advice,
Sassy Anne Taintor magnet can be found on Amazon 

 

Let’s have a little fun today.  What are some things you think should NEVER be said on a first date?  These are actual statements from people I’ve met.  Seriously.

  1. As you open the menu-I have expensive taste.  You’re buying, right?
  2. Will this take more than 2 hours?  I have another date at 10:00.
  3. Just to let you know…can you drop me off by like 10:00?  I’d like to go out after this.
  4. Wow…you remind me of my Daddy!
  5. Does this outfit make me look fat?
  6. I’m not eating much tonight.  I’m losing weight so I look good when we have sex.
  7. I want a baby.
  8. I have my period and the cramps are KILLING me!
  9. This place is boring.
  10. I’m bored.
  11. So, like I took the Cosmo compatibility test…and we are perfect for each other!
  12. When can you meet my parents this weekend?
  13. How much money do you make?
  14. What’s your name again?
  15. I don’t really read.  I watch a lot of TV though.
  16. I don’t really see the need for a portfolio or a budget.
  17. The last book I read was “How to Get a Guy to Marry You in 6 Weeks.”  It was fascinating.
  18. So…what is the LAST thing you want me to know about you and your family?
  19. Just so you know, I am on the pill.  Right now.
  20. My last relationship ended because he wouldn’t marry me.
  21. My last relationship ended because he didn’t want to make me pregnant.
  22. So how’s this going?  Do you like me?
  23. My ex-boyfriend is my BEST friend.
  24. My therapist says I have control issues.
  25. I pass gas and drool in my sleep.
  26. This is the best time I’ve had in such a long time!  I can’t remember the last time I went out!
  27. Wow.  That bartender over there is smokin’ hot.
  28. I saw how you looked at our waitress.  (Then stare at him with evil eyes)
  29. I don’t remember what happened on my last first date because I passed out.
  30. Hey!  Let’s do tequila shots!
  31. I love you.

Yes, I know people who have said similar things.  Have you said them?  If you have, chuckle over it and up the “mysterious you.” It’s all good.  I’m sure that in my younger years I said some really dumb things on a first date.  We all have.  Laughter is the best medicine right?  😉  Love, Goddess

Do you find yourself saying things like this or opening up too quickly to a man you’re dating?  Get this in check NOW!  

© S Stevens Life Strategies

She’s So Dangerous

Anne Taintor image from the blog Real Foods and Me

This post is dedicated to one of my clients…Jerri.  Jerri was so adorable in her refusal to TAKE what she needed for herself while dating men.  She has learned to keep the focus on her needs.  If she is exhausted from work and he wants to see her last-minute?  She is vague but pleasant.  She tells him she will get back to him the very next day with her availability.  She has learned how to keep him playfully engaged in her while staying focused on what’s going on inside of her.   She has re-discovered the art of dating and getting to know a man slowly…and is rocking herself and him.  Well done, Jerri!  Here is an example from life that is quite similar to hers.  Here we go:

The Bitch has made a huge step:  I called the man I’m dating “hon” in a text.

Oooo….you live life so dangerously, Goddess! (Yes be as sarcastic and wise-cracky as you want.  I get it)  This may seem like a little thing for you, hot and sassy readers, but for me it’s HUGE.  So why the huge deal?  I’ve been dating this man for a month and a half now.  He’s been calling me “babe, sweetie and honey” for at least half that.  Me?  Not one little word that would come close to being “relationship -y.”  To me those “little words” =  one step closer to a relationship.  Which I’m not sure I want yet.  Even with a man who (so far) treats me beautifully.  Hell, for weeks I told him in an uber playful way that I “thought I may like him.”  To his credit, he played right along with me.  Then he told me he knew he liked me. “I know I like you.”  Me, the playful Bitch responded:  “Are you sure?  I can give you some more time to think about it.”  He loved that!  Notice how I am not playing games.  I am being honest with him and playfully responding to his getting closer to me so I have time to figure out my own feelings.

In the past…before I embraced being a Bitch, I didn’t handle this well with the men I was in dating.  In the past when boyfriends would tell me they loved me,  I didn’t know what to say because:

  1. I was shocked.  Which was really my own insecurity:   Me?  You love me?
  2. Guilt:  I wasn’t sure if I loved him back so I would start to worry about everything.  Which leads to the Drama Queen taking over!

So I would say nothing.  Except maybe thank you.  Or hug them or kiss them.  Change the subject.  Avoiding my feelings and theirs. Complicate the whole process with Drama Queen worry. The Drama Queen kept me from seeing the simple:  I wasn’t ready.  I’ve always wanted to take things slower than slow in a sleep on the second date world.  Today?  It’s like a guy kisses you after the first date and he assumes you’re ready for mounting!   SO not me.   For me, I’ve always wanted the man who wants to enjoy the dating process.   Savor the first kiss and the thought of the second.  Soft caresses that drive you mad with want.  Enjoying and relishing the next moment where you have the pleasure of enjoying each others’ touch.  All while getting to know each other with conversation that keeps our minds passionately engaged as well.

The man I’m dating is giving me all of that.  Would you believe on our last date he softly caressed and kissed me for 4 hours?  And we’ve kept our clothes on.  All of them.   I know it’s hard to believe, but if you know what you want, how you want to be treated and communicate to a MAN and not a BOY/GUY it will happen for you.  Please please tell me that you are jealous and want some seriously long foreplay like this with a man who adores you.  You are so worth it!  Use this story to propel you into what you want from a man.  How you want to be treated and adored.  I so want that for all of you!  My client Jerri says she is relishing slowly getting to know her new boyfriends’ intellect, sense of play and body.  As he is hers!

I’ve just relayed you one of my little nuances in dating.  What are yours?  Do you stay firmly grounded in them?  Don’t ever let your dating needs/desires/wants fall away.  You will be surprised at what pleasure comes your way!  What is it that you would love a man to pleasure hot, sexy little you with?  Either share here pronto or make yourself a hot little list.  Keep it by your bed and relish the thought of your list coming true.  Then have sweet dreams!  Love, Goddess

Want what Jerri and my other clients are discovering with men?  My course will give you the tools to help you ROCK the male species. Your Re-Awakening!

© S Stevens Life Strategies

Falling in Love Key?

falling in love,
Image of gorgeous heart found at Carp Canada: http://www.carp.ca/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Love_heart.jpg

Falling in Love Key:  Dating Yourself.  If you don’t want to date yourself…how do you expect anyone else to want to?  So for the next few weeks every time you leave the house you’re going on a fabulous date.  With yourself.  I don’t care if you’re going out to pump gas.  It’s the best pumping you’ve ever gotten.  I know…naughty metaphor.  Make everything you do a fun, kick ass sassy date, Bitch!  Yeah…it’s winter.   Yeah…it’s cold.  Yeah…sometimes you just want to cuddle up with your lap top.  I get it and want to do that too.  You have to get out though and play.  Even after a long day of work.  Looking for someone to love besides yourself?  Get out and play, then!

  1. Get out of the house.  If you’re healing from a break up, anywhere will do.  If you’re feeling more adventurous, join a club, take a class, search the local entertainment papers for something, anything to do!
  2. Step out in style.  Make the effort to look your best.  Fave outfit, fun make-up, hot shoes and accessories.
  3. Own your walk.  When you walk into a room, store, anywhere, enter with confidence.  Make up something to say that makes you feel good:  “Hope you all are ready.  Cuz’ here I come!”
  4. Ooze happiness.  When you’re getting ready to “step out in style,” play your favorite music, take a few minutes to slow down and get excited about discovering and meeting new people.
  5. Be aware of your body language.  Don’t slouch.  Hold your head up high.  Stand up straight.  LOOK lively.
  6. Try, if you’re up to it, to get a man’s attention with your smile.  Or make eye contact then give him the gift of a dazzling smile from hot little you.
  7. Spark spontaneous conversation.  Be warm, open and friendly.
  8. Make a man feel good.  Feel important.  With sincerity!
  9. Bitch it Up and make this a one day a week affair with a wonderful girlfriend.
  10. Slow down and savor touch.  If you’re out shopping, seek out different textures and materials.  Caress the material with your fingertips.  Enjoy the touch.  Purchase only that which feels incredible on your beautiful skin.  Your skin is so worth it!
  11. Give yourself flowers at least ONCE during these weeks.
  12. No expectations.  Don’t over think it.   Enjoy being in the moment!

So what are your favorite ways to get out of the house and create a little fun?  Please share:  Click here: Facebook Bitch Lifestyle page.   Love, Goddess

© S Stevens Life Strategies

Dating Tips for Women Concept #1: Signs a Man Wants You to Chase Him

Fun Anne Tainter pic from Wanderer in a Strange Land http://madiantin.blogspot.com/2011/02/i-love-anne-taintor.html

Today and tomorrow we’re going to discuss 2 dating tips for women concepts.  Before we get to concept #1, check out this post:  Dating Tips for Women:  Let a Man Chase You Here’s How  then meet me back here for the fun.

Dating Tips for Women Concept #1:  Signs that a man wants YOU to chase HIM.  This is “Guy A.”   I love “Guy A” because he’s a text book example for this concept.  He gives me his number, then tells me to call him.   Do I?  Please.  I agree to IM with him and give him my AIM name.  Do I IM him first?  Please.  Finally he IMs me and here is our conversation.  What I am thinking during the conversation is in italics.

Guy A:  What’s good?  Wow…that’s a hot greeting.   No hi, how are you?  FYI:  He’s putting pressure on me to tell him something good to impress him.  Trust me, nothing good is going on with him.  This is the type of guy who puts it all on the woman to please him.

Me:  Blueberry pie and red wine.  This is a set up statement.  So I can call him on his shit.

Him:  Ya got some 4 me?  All about you, isn’t it honey? 

Me:  You’ve got to earn that kind of love from me, Hotstuff.

Him:  What do I do?

Me:  You don’t know how to earn that kind of love from a woman? Don’t waste my time.  If you don’t know, I’m not telling you.

Him:  Where r u?  Notice how the subject is changed.  I called him on his “shit” and he got it.

Me:  Work.

Him:  What do you do for work?

Me:  I run a web site for women that are kick ass.

Silence.

He didn’t respond quick enough so I logged off.  I was talking with my best friend and had other things to do.  Plus, the whole question grilling thing was not fun for me.  So…how Bitchy was that on a scale of 1-10?  Fairly high.  LOL!  This guy is interested, but I’m not taking him seriously because he has done nothing to make me do so.  This man wants me to chase him.   This is what a “guy” does.  A “MAN” backs up his words with actions.  He does what he says he’s going to do.  He greets you warmly—even in an instant message.

Now that I’ve told you all this, don’t get mad.  Don’t hate this “guy.”  He’s just clueless on how to treat a woman.  No one has properly told him.  Or kicked him in the ass when he’s not being a gentleman.  Isn’t that a bit sad?  This is why I want you to not take the whole dating thing so seriously.  You’re going to meet men who are clueless.  You’re going to meet amazing ones too.  This is a learning experience.   Check your “Brat” at the door and let your “Bitch in the room.”  Who Controls You Your Bitch or Your Brat? 

Got it?  If you have any questions, please let me know!  Get ready for tomorrow’s discussion:  Dating Tips for Women Concept #2:  A Man Says What He Means!  Love, Goddess

For More:

  1.  I Need Help With a Guy!   
  2.  On Amazon:  Bitch Lifestyle the Manual
  3.  Bitch Lifestyle Home 

© S Stevens Life Strategies