Dissed and Dismissed?

Dissed and Dismissed?

Not you, not me, not The Bitch.  Here’s an example from yesterday.

I received a message from a new follower on Twitter.  She runs a dating web site for Seniors.  She wrote that we had a lot in common and would be good together.  I checked out her site and agreed.  What fun, I thought.  I sent her a playful message back saying I would love to learn from her.  I thought about the sassy fun we could have!  She replied back:   “You’re young.  You’re going to need at least 30 years before my knowledge of sex is relevant to you.”

Excuse me? (insert sassy smile here)

I called her on it.  Politely.  I said “Women of every age can learn.  I’m always learning and expanding:  Just back from taking the amazing Sheri Winston’s workshop “Women’s Anatomy of Arousal.”

I haven’t heard back.  Bitch had the last word.

Am I focusing on the Diss?  No.  Here’s what we should focus on:  The narrow view point.  Of us all being lumped into one big kettle.  Old, young, experienced, inexperienced, etc.  All women should be nurturing their sensuality.  And not categorized in the process.  If you’re a bit naughtier that me, go you!  If not, no apologies.  We’ve been gifted the ability to have pleasure-rockin’ orgasms.  We should share each others knowledge to expand each others knowledge and experience, no?

My girlfriends and I had so much fun in our workshop with Sheri Winston.  We discussed all the different kinds of orgasms we had.  When one of us wanted another girls’ type, there was no dismissal.  It was something we wanted to get!  My friends and I view jealousy a bit differently now than we were taught growing up.  We’ve been taught jealousy is bad.  Selfish.  That’s giving jealousy all the power.  What if jealousy is really desire?  We have taken away the negative meaning we were taught about jealousy and see it instead as something we may want to explore.  Instead of getting jealous of another womans’ success or fun we think…hmmm.  That sounds good.  I want some of that!  We enjoy the thought of getting it.  That’s one of the reasons I’m constantly asking you to share your ideas, discoveries and fun here at Bitch Lifestyle.  Fun discoveries=oh so good for us all!

So here is the bottom line.  Does this woman who dissed me have a little jealousy toward younger women?  Don’t know.  Don’t really care.  Does she have some amazing tricks up her sleeve that she isn’t ready to share?  Don’t know.  Don’t really care.  What I do care about is how she assumed something about me just because I’m younger than her.  That’s “labeling a person” before you get to know them.  What I do care about is women supporting each other.  I love older people because I learn from them.  I love younger people because their energy and enthusiasm feeds me.  Watch the labeling done in our society.  Usually people “label” to take power away from the “label-ee.” Don’t let someone label you, hottie.  Put the power trip on ice calmly and politely.  Love, Goddess

Check out this fantastic letter a friend of mine, Tammi, sent to a columnist at The Boston Globe.  She politely calls the columnist out for her “lack of an answer.”


© S Stevens Life Strategies

6 thoughts on “Dissed and Dismissed?

  1. Your response is exactly how I would have responded in that situation. 🙂 My girlfriends are the same, especially my friend Megan. We divulge to each other, knowledge is power, ya know??

  2. Yes! Love it. I’m so glad you’ve got a hot group of girlfriends who get this! I can only
    imagine the fun you all have together. Hugs, Goddess

  3. Older woman have a lot of challenges. One that all men prefer young woman over older. Sure once twice a little cougar is fun but in reality older women are invisible demeaned and always dissed for younger ones. Always.Not to mention society and youth culture…So yeah me jelly.. of your youth only. i see how easy it was for u to jump on this older lady…we do have diff challenges that u couyldn’t understand, cuz all those dudes love u for your personality. the personality they will cARE LESS ABOUT IN FAVOR OF ANY DUMB YOUNG HOTTIE AFTER U REACH A CERTAIN AGE. BELIEVE WHAT U WANT, dEMI, BUT IT’S THE TRUTH.

  4. Hi Skhigh,
    All women have challenges. (warm smile) One of the goals of Bitch Lifestyle is not to let the challenges win. I would have loved to learn from this older woman. To educate and learn from each other. I love this book by Betsy Prioleau: Seductress.
    In it she has a whole chapter called “Silver Foxes.” Older women who rocked at seduction. I learned a lot from them and the so called “Ugly Seductresses” in her book. Maybe you’ll take a look for some interesting fun? Love, Goddess

Leave a Comment