Is There Such Thing as a Good Cry?


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woman crying 21 The Faux Girlfriend
Image from “The Faux Girlfriend” http://bitchlifestyle.com/2011/01/the-faux-girlfriend/

Is crying good for you?  I was overwhelmed with resistance last week while I was crying.  It was the most beautiful, pathetic crying, too.  Drama Queen wanting to release and Bitch struggling not to.  I would bravely hold back my tears and try to focus on “action,” instead.  Then falling into crying again and then once again trying to resist it.  The resistance was driving me a little mad.  Why was I resisting crying?  Do you do that?  Why do we resist crying when we have every right to?  Every right to release in this powerful way that was given to us in our bodies?  My Drama Queen wanted to cry and my Bitch wanted to stop.  Or was it the other way around?  I need a good cry, right? The question that came to mind was this:  Is there such a thing as a good cry?

Then it hit me:  “I hate crying when I have so much to be thankful for.”

So that was it.  Guilt.  I felt so guilty for crying when I had so much to be thankful for, so much to live for and so much life to surrender to.  Which was in direct irony with why I was crying.  I was crying over the loss of a girlfriend who had died from cancer.  What right did I have to cry when I was alive, healthy and have so much to be grateful for?

The knowing what the resistance was all about – guilt – made me feel better.  It also led me to the answer I needed to help me take action.  Which made me feel even better!  Every case is different, but there is such thing as a good cry.  We shouldn’t feel bad or guilty about it.  We should let it go so we can see the guilt, (or whatever) deal with the guilt and listen to the solution that will make us feel better.

Examples of good crying:

  1. Releasing it due to loss.  Crying, like rage, is letting go.  A necessary purging so we can move on.
  2. While watching a movie and something makes the tears flow.  This happens to me a lot!  And sometimes it’s the silliest thing that’s so beautiful to me.  But is it really silly?  No.  It’s something that moves you so relish that little part of you that is moved.  There are good movies to cry to and good songs to cry to.  Find your favorites!

Examples of Drama Queen ruling:

  1. Repeatedly crying over loss.  Not letting things you cannot control GO.  These things may include a bad job experience, bad friends and a guy that doesn’t treat you like the Goddess you are.
  2. Stress:  We may be so overwhelmed that taking action may have to be looked into.  This is where you ask and listen to those who love you most.  They will be able to lead you and support you so you can take steps to feel better.

You’ve had a good cry when:  You finish and start to feel calm.  You feel almost normal again.  Take a few moments and savor the feeling.  This would be a good time to up the ante:  Immediately do something good for yourself.  A hot shower is one of my favorites.  Is it good to cry?  I’d say yes to crying!  So please share … when is a wonderful time to have a good cry?  Or not so much?

Love, Goddess

For your reading pleasure.  More on this subject:

  1. So You Had a Bad Day
  2. Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying
  3. Pathways to Bliss
  4. Bitch Lifestyle Home

© S Stevens Life Strategies

2 thoughts on “Is There Such Thing as a Good Cry?

  1. Did you know that there are certain toxins that can ONLY be released from your body through tears? If there was ever a reason for a good cry, that’s it.

    I schedule in a “Goddess Cry” at least once a month (a good time is during the menstrual cycle when We are releasing other toxins, too) right along with a good Bitch-Diva-Temper-Tantrum. These are Love-Me Rituals that every Woman is entitled to. Just be considerate not to freak out innocent bystanders… unless they deserve it…

    WHO told Us that crying was “bad” and why do We believe it? I will give you a clue: males made that up because they weaken when We cry… unless they are of the barbarian-troglodyte type who feels a sense of alleviation from his self-loathing because he made you cry.

    One of My Mentors told Me to have a good cry regularly and then, wipe your face with a cloth dipped in cool water and drink a glass of water – it balances your system. Tell yourself that you love you and all is well with your world and that you CAN HANDLE IT – WHATEVER IT IS. She is right!

  2. Mistress Didi: Brilliant scheduling your “Goddess Cry” during the menstrual cycle. Everything seems to be so much more dramatic for us with all the changes rocking our bodies! Check out her website beauties. And that is a playful dare! Thanks Mistress…Love, Goddess

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