One of my favorite songs is about a man’s Wild Child. It’s on the Bitch Soundtrack to your right on this web page. “Butterfly” by Crazy Town has an infectious beat and sexy lyrics. The man thanks the woman in his life for taming his wild child. In return he wants to give her pleasure. Mmmm….! Ready to tame a mans’ Wild Child? You are if you fell in love with yourself in my “Love Affair Blogs.”
Men and women screw up. We’re human. Men appreciate a woman who forgives him when he screws up. However, if a woman is too forgiving the wild child in him will take advantage of her kindness. The Bitch politely points out the problem, states what she wants and then lets him take action. She doesn’t fret or nag. She’s too busy having fun. What turns her on? A man who follows through. Words are nothing if they aren’t backed up with actions.
So how to we do this? We love ourselves, research what we like, take care of our minds and bodies and learn to communicate in a mans’ language. Men communicate in a clear, direct and unemotional way. When there’s a problem their goal is to solve it. We understand this, know what we want and state a solution to the problem. Following is an example of how I do this:
I had an exhausting and fun weekend. Friday night I had wine with a hot male friend at an Italian restaurant. Saturday I partied in Boston with 8 beautiful women. We ate delicious homemade Indian food and celebrated a birthday. Sunday I celebrated my nieces’ birthdays. We made puzzles, read stories, played hide and seek and ate cake. Between the festivities I was enjoying the men who are interested in dating me.
It’s up to me to communicate with men what I want in a date. What I want is a slow courtship. I’m in no rush. I want a man to demonstrate affection, fun, respect and caring over time. It becomes a habit with him to treat me like a Goddess. I’ll appreciate and adore this man for making me happy. Here is the progress with 3 of my suitors:
I finally agreed to a date with “E,” Quick recap. About a month and a half ago I told him I thought he was coming on too strong. I told him what I was looking for in a date. He has come through beautifully.
“Sexy Scorpio:” We had a hot intellectual conversation, fun flirtation and he wanted to know when he could see me. He has a tendency to call last minute and I’m NOT last minute girl. I’m booked up this week and I’m going on vacation next week. I’m doing things on my timetable not HIS. I want a man who respects my life and because of that makes plans ahead of time, not last minute. He sounded disappointed that I wasn’t available. So I stated something fun for us to do. “I would love to talk to you and flirt with you until we do have time to meet.” I’ve given him the appropriate action and I’ll enjoy whatever he produces.
“Leo” did something inappropriate last week and apologized. I liked what he had to say but wasn’t sure if I wanted to start dating him. I nicely but firmly told him that. Then I offered a solution that would make both of us happy: “I’m giving you three weeks to show me that you’re a person I should be dating.” He’s now happily trying to do that. Why did this work with “Leo?”
1. He was sincerely sorry for being inappropriate. He wasn’t sure if there was a way to make it up to me. His words told me he was searching for one.
2. I agreed with him that he was inappropriate.
3. I stated exactly what I wanted in a man: I wanted to date a man who I could get to know slowly, have fun, laugh, play and explore with.
4. I stated the problem…Because of his inappropriate behavior I wasn’t sure that he was that man.
5. I offered a solution. One where he could take action…over time to prove he was “date able” to me.
6. I’ve made it his choice. All I have to do now is sit back and enjoy what he wants to do for me.
1. Take some time to get rid of any anger you may have toward a man or the world in general. http://bitchlifestyle.com/2009/06/our-love-affair-day-3yay-angry-bitch/ (Dance, work out, scream) Notice how much better you feel.
2. Then start thinking about something nice you would want from a man. Make a list.
3. When you are out and about and you see a man? Think about something you may want. If you don’t want anything? Cool. Would you like to flirt with someone? Go for it. Would you like help with something heavy you’re carrying? Find a man and greet him warmly. State what you want and thank him when he produces.
Let me know how it goes!
© S Stevens Life Strategies