Worst way to break up with someone?
I was watching TV this morning when something stopped my restless remote surfing. An interview on Fox News about how not to screw up Valentines Day. It was with relationship expert Siggy Flicker of Marie Claire magazine. I thought most of her advice was good. One was horrible. Colorful language awful. It’s a big reason why relationships are so hard today and why it’s so hard to trust someone! A question was asked to Ms. Flicker: I want to break off with my boyfriend. Should I wait until after Valentines Day?
Difficult situation? Absolutely. Which one would you choose for your boyfriend?
- Yes. Spare his feelings and let him take you out. Break off with him the next day. You don’t want to make Valentines Day a tragedy for him for the rest of his life.
- No. Be honest and tell him that it’s not going to work. Wish him well.
The bottom line is you want to break up. Deal with that and don’t create more drama and hurt by lying and putting off the truth. What do you think, Sassy Ones? Ms. Flicker advice was option #1 from above. My blood boiled over that advice. How would you like to be taken on a wonderfully romantic date and then dumped the next day? To spare your feelings? Are you kidding me? If a man made love to me and then broke up with me the next day? I would realize it was just sex for him. So I would feel heartbroken and used! Regarding a difficult choice always go with the more honest option. At the very least you’re being honest.
You can’t love and trust without honesty.
I interviewed lots of men regarding this matter. Here are the most popular answers:
“The sooner the better.” Gary
“She’s giving him false hope.” Giovanni
“Before Valentine’s Day. My girlfriend dumped me on Valentine’s day. I spent my lunch money on chocolates and flowers and she dumped me.” Jon
“She isn’t dealing with the problem. She’s just putting things off.” Gary…again…great advice.
“By being afraid of hurting him she’s hurting him more.” Ben
“Wow. What a crappy way to break off with someone.” Paul
“She’s avoiding the problem.” Barry
“Both are bad. Personally if I were to end things I would wait ’til at least a week after Valentine’s Day. But if I have to choose between them, it depends how things are going. If things are clearly bad and we’d just be going through the motions on Valentine’s Day, I’d appreciate her dumping me before so I don’t have to spend a bunch of money creating a romantic night for us. If things are mostly ok but she wants to break up because it’s “just not quite right,” then I think we should have one last Valentine’s Day fun night together and then end it.” Howie Notice how this answer involves communication between the couple? Howie would communicate openly about the issue.
“I think, as a man, I would prefer the break up to happen before Valentine’s Day. Conversely, I think women would prefer the opposite.” Steven
“I guess, I would prefer before, to avoid that day and spending money on the young lady, because you would feel used.” Ezra
And input from my very wise and strong best friend Mary Ann:
“It’s the difference between the weak person and the strong person. The weak person avoids the problem, the strong one deals with it.” Mary Ann
So there you have it. The worst way to break up with someone. Love, Goddess
© S Stevens Life Strategies